Are you seeking holiness? Part Two
To grow in holiness begins with the realization that it is the will of God that we are holy as He is Holy. Our response to this realization and grace needs to become serious about being a holy man of God.
The first step is to acknowledge that you are a disciple of Jesus Christ because of your baptism and his witness because of your confirmation. A disciple is one who places himself under the discipline of a master to learn from the master. Jesus is our Master/Teacher.
As such, Jesus calls you to come under his Lordship. What does this mean? Think of it this way. Your life is a circle. In the circle are all the things that you are involved in, all the things that are part of your daily life, all the things you consider important. What is at the center of your life? What is the thing that is controlling your life or determining you? Is your family? Your business? Your pleasures? Is it Jesus?
If Jesus is one among many in your life, if he is in the outer fringes, except for one hour on Sunday, then he is not the Lord of your life. But if you make Jesus the most important aspect of your life, even above family, then you will have all things in their proper order, including family. You will be a better husband and father, provider and protector. That is what Jesus means when he says that we can’t be fully his disciple if we are not ready to put everything second to him, including family, job, pleasure, etc.
How does this happen? Before you make important decisions in your life, you need to check with the Master to make sure that what you are about to do is of him. It means that you spend quality time with the Lord, talking to him about what you are doing or about to do to see if it is pleasing to him or not. It is deliberately choosing to follow his Word, the Scriptures, over and beyond what the culture or modern thinking says. Will this bring you closer to God or further separate you? You choose to put every thought, word and deed under the umbrella of being pleasing to the Lord. You belong to him and everything you are and have belongs to him.
Does this seem radical? It is! Does it seem impossible? It is not! This has been the path of saints, ordinary people like you and me, for centuries. They chose to take off the sunglasses of the culture of the day and see through the eyes of God the path the Lord invited them to walk. Will it be easy? No! Nothing worth achieving is easy. Nothing of great value, comes easy.
Jesus used the parable of the man that is in search of the pearl of great price. When he finds it, he sells all he has in order to obtain this priceless pearl. Holiness is that great pearl. Are you willing to sacrifice all that hinders you from being holy in order to experience the true fulfillment of your existence?
All this may seem overwhelming to you. But like everything else, you must take baby steps before you can walk, before you can jog, before you can sprint. Each step builds confidence. Yes, you will fall many times in the process, but getting back on the path is important to reaching the goal. Have the desire to be holy and then put that desire into action, no matter what it costs or how long it will take.
The secret is love. The more we are doing things in and out of love of God, the more we will be becoming holy. Here is a easy formula to remember and implement in your life. Do what you are suppose to do; when you are suppose to do it; the way you are suppose to do it; to the best of your ability for the love of God.
Remember holiness is not something you can measure everyday of your life. It is only when you are on the path of holiness and, after a period of time, look back, then you may be able to see where you came from and where you are. But the real excitement is that the path before you will bring you to greater holiness.
"When we look critically at the many thoughts and feelings that fill our minds and hearts, we may come to the horrifying discovery that we often choose death instead of life, curse instead of blessing. Jealousy, envy, anger, resentment, greed, lust, vindictiveness, revenge, hatred ... they all float in that large reservoir of our inner life. Often we take them for granted and allow them to be there and do their destructive work. But God asks us to choose life and to choose blessing. This choice requires an immense inner discipline. It requires a great attentiveness to the death-forces within us and a great commitment to let the forces of life come to dominate our thoughts and feelings. We cannot always do this alone; often we need a caring guide or a loving community to support us. But it is important that we both make the inner effort and seek the support we need from others to help us choose life." (Henri Nouwen) As Jesus has said, the road to life is narrow and the road to death is wide. What narrows the road for us is the filtering and purification of our thoughts. How do we do this? By grace, yes, but by our response to that grace. What does that look like? St. Paul says: Do not conform to this age (all that leads to death, the wide road), but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, choosing in all things the will of God, what is good, pleasing and perfect. In this way, we narrow the road so that we can enter the narrow gate.
Great crowds were traveling with Jesus, and he turned and addressed them,
Jesus gives some reflections on the role and life of a disciple.
"If anyone comes to me without hating his father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters, and even his own life, he cannot be my disciple.
The first cost of discipleship is a certain detachment from those closest to us. If it comes to making a decision which says we have to choose between Jesus and a member of our family, whom would we choose.? This is the total commitment of discipleship.
Jesus is not asking for total separation or rejection of our family, but a realization that he alone is the Lord and no one else must be given that status in our life. He is first at all times.
Have we had to face that point in our life, even in small matters, where following Jesus was more important than pleasing family?
Whoever does not carry his own cross and come after me cannot be my disciple.
Following Jesus means readiness to accept persecution and suffering. Have we experienced this in our faith journey as a disciple of Jesus? What decisions did we make? What did we learn?
Notice he says "his own cross." We are not expected to carry anyone else’s cross. Ours is tailored for us at this moment of our life. Which of you wishing to construct a tower does not first sit down and calculate the cost to see if there is enough for its completion? Otherwise, after laying the foundation and finding himself unable to finish the work the onlookers should laugh at him and say, ‘This one began to build but did not have the resources to finish.’ Or what king marching into battle would not first sit down and decide whether with ten thousand troops he can successfully oppose another king advancing upon him with twenty thousand troops? But if not, while he is still far away, he will send a delegation to ask for peace terms.
Sometimes we want to follow Jesus on our own terms but we do not assess the cost of disciple and our commitment to embrace it fully. Something may be worth it, but whether I am willing to pay the price may be another consideration.
How important is following Jesus to you? Are there any limitations or restrictions or conditions you are placing on your response? If the call is from Jesus, do we accept his call unreservedly or conditionally?
In the same way, anyone of you who does not renounce all his possessions cannot be my disciple."
What does this mean?
Recall the time the rich young man came to Jesus and ask what it took to gain eternal life. Jesus said basically he should keep the commandments of love. The man said he was doing this but asked what more is needed. Jesus said that he should seek holiness and total dependency on him, go and free himself of all obligations and possessions and come and follow him totally. The man could not because he could let go his possessions.
Discipleship is not necessarily physical poverty but definitely spiritual poverty where nothing else matters in one’s life but Jesus and being and serving him.
How do we apply these sayings of Jesus in our own life today?
I have to be more vigilant in taking captive my thoughts, especially those what are not pleasing to you, those that are not thoughts of love. they are valueless. If I do not take them captive, then I lose my inner peace and intimacy with you. These are the thoughts that do not come from you. The quicker I can filter them, the better I will be. I need the grace of vigilance. I also pray for the grace of renewal of my mind, so that I can choose "your will, what is good, pleasing and perfect." This is the daily struggle on the road of holiness.
Novena for the Nativity of Our Lady August 31-September 8
Day One: August 31
V. O God, come to my assistance
R. O Lord, make haste to help me
Glory be to the Father...
Heavenly Child, lovable Mary, the Eternal Father delights in your birth, for He beholds in your coming into this world one of His creatures who is so perfect that she will become the worthy Mother of His divine Son. May your birth give joy to my soul also, by obtaining for me from the heavenly Father, the pardon of my sins, and an abiding sorrow for them.
Hail Mary...
Antiphon: Your Nativity, O Virgin Mother of God, was the herald of joy to the whole world; since from thine arose the Sun of Justice, Christ our God, who, destroying the curse, bestowed the blessing, and confounding death, rewarded us with life everlasting.
V. Let us celebrate with joy the birth of the Blessed Virgin Mary.
R. That she may intercede for us with Our Lord Jesus Christ.
Let us pray
Grant to us your servants, we beseech You, O Lord, the gift of Your heavenly grace, that as our salvation was begun in the child-bearing of the Blessed Virgin, so from this solemn festival of her Nativity may we obtain an increase of peace. Through Our Lord Jesus Christ. Amen.
Day Two: September 1
V. O God, come to my assistance
R. O Lord, make haste to help me
Glory be to the Father....
O Chosen One among the daughters of Adam, admirable Mary, the Son of God delights in your birth, for He beholds the one chosen to be His Mother, and oh! such a beloved Mother. May your birth give joy to my soul also, by obtaining from your divine Son the grace to be born again spiritually to a holy life, perfectly conformed to yours, so that I may merit to obtain eternal glory.
Hail Mary...
Antiphon: Your Nativity, O Virgin Mother of God, was the herald of joy to the whole world; since from you arose the Sun of Justice, Christ our God, who, destroying the curse, bestowed the blessing, and confounding death, rewarded us with life everlasting.
V. Let us celebrate with joy the birth of the Blessed Virgin Mary.
R. That she may intercede for us with Our Lord Jesus Christ.
Let us pray
Grant to us your servants, we beseech You, O Lord, the gift of Your heavenly grace, that as our salvation was begun in the child-bearing of the Blessed Virgin, so from this solemn festival of her Nativity may we obtain an increase of peace. Through Our Lord Jesus Christ. Amen.
Day Three: September 2
V. O God, come to my assistance
R. O Lord, make haste to help me
Glory be to the Father
O Chosen One among the daughters of Adam, lovable Mary, the Eternal Word takes delight in your birth, for He sees the source of His Immaculate Blood. May your birth give joy to my soul also, by obtaining for me from the Word made Flesh, the grace to find in this Divine Blood the eternal happiness of my soul.
Hail Mary...
Antiphon: Thy Nativity, O Virgin Mother of God, was the herald of joy to the whole world; since from you arose the Sun of Justice, Christ our God, Who, destroying the curse, bestowed the blessing, and confounding death, rewarded us with life everlasting.
V. Let us celebrate with joy the birth of the Blessed Virgin Mary.
R. That she may intercede for us with Our Lord Jesus Christ.
Let us pray
Grant to us your servants, we beseech You, O Lord, the gift of Your heavenly grace, that as our salvation was begun in the child-bearing of the Blessed Virgin, so from this solemn festival of her Nativity may we obtain an increase of peace. Through Our Lord Jesus Christ. Amen.
Day Four: September 3
V. O God, come to my assistance
R. O Lord, make haste to help me
Glory be to the Father....
O Chosen One among the daughters of Adam, admirable Mary, the Redeemer, promised to mankind from the beginning of the world, takes delight in your birth, for He sees the one who is destined to become the co-redemptrix of souls by uniting her tears to the Blood shed on the Cross to save mankind.
Hail Mary...
Antiphon: Thy Nativity, O Virgin Mother of God, was the herald of joy to the whole world; since from thee arose the Sun of Justice, Christ our God, Who, destroying the curse, bestowed the blessing, and confounding death, rewarded us with life everlasting.
V. Let us celebrate with joy the birth of the Blessed Virgin Mary.
R. That she may intercede for us with Our Lord Jesus Christ.
Let us pray
Grant to us your servants, we beseech You, O Lord, the gift of Your heavenly grace, that as our salvation was begun in the child-bearing of the Blessed Virgin, so from this solemn festival of her Nativity may we obtain an increase of peace. Through Our Lord Jesus Christ. Amen.
Day Five: September 4
V. O God, come to my assistance
R. O Lord, make haste to help me
Glory be to the Father...
Resplendent Lily of Paradise, lovable Mary, the Holy Ghost takes delight in your birth for He sees in you the soul never stained by sin, which would forever be His worthy Temple. May your birth give joy to my soul also, by obtaining for me from the Sanctifier and your divine Spouse His divine love and final perseverance.
Hail Mary...
Antiphon: Your Nativity, O Virgin Mother of God, was the herald of joy to the whole world; since from you arose the Sun of Justice, Christ our God, Who, destroying the
curse, bestowed the blessing, and confounding death, rewarded us with life everlasting.
V. Let us celebrate with joy the birth of the Blessed Virgin Mary.
R. That she may intercede for us with Our Lord Jesus Christ.
Let us pray
Grant to us your servants, we beseech You, O Lord, the gift of Your heavenly grace, that as our salvation was begun in the child-bearing of the Blessed Virgin, so from this solemn festival of her Nativity may we obtain an increase of peace. Through Our Lord Jesus Christ. Amen.
Day Six: September 5
V. O God, come to my assistance
R. O Lord, make haste to help me
Glory be to the Father....
Most Beautiful Branch of the tree of David, most admirable Mary, whose birth was such a consolation to St. Joachim and St. Anne who were delighted to be the parents of so holy a child, may your birth be the consolation of my soul, by obtaining for me from God, victory over the world and detachment from all the things of this earth.
Hail Mary...
Antiphon: Your Nativity, O Virgin Mother of God, was the herald of joy to the whole world; since from you arose the Sun of Justice, Christ our God, Who, destroying the curse, bestowed the blessing, and confounding death, rewarded us with life everlasting.
V. Let us celebrate with joy the birth of the Blessed Virgin Mary.
R. That she may intercede for us with Our Lord Jesus Christ.
Let us pray
Grant to us Your servants, we beseech You, O Lord, the gift of Your heavenly grace, that as our salvation was begun in the child-bearing of the Blessed Virgin, so from this solemn festival of her Nativity may we obtain an increase of peace. Through Our Lord Jesus Christ. Amen.
Day Seven: September 6
V. O God, come to my assistance
R. O Lord, make haste to help me
Glory be to the Father...
Resplendent Morning Star, lovable Mary, your birth was the cause of great joy to the angels, for they beheld in you the Mother of the Redeemer of the world, Who by His Death would repair the loss sustained by the fall of rebellions angels in paradise. May your birth give joy to my soul also, by obtaining for me from God, victory over the infernal enemy, deliverance from all his snares, and the grace to be associated in glory with the angels in Heaven.
Hail Mary...
Antiphon: Your Nativity, O Virgin Mother of God, was the herald of joy to the whole world; since from you arose the Sun of Justice, Christ our God, Who, destroying the curse, bestowed the blessing, and confounding death, rewarded us with life everlasting.
V. Let us celebrate with joy the birth of the Blessed Virgin Mary.
R. That she may intercede for us with Our Lord Jesus Christ.
Let us pray
Grant to us your servants, we beseech You, O Lord, the gift of Your heavenly grace, that as our salvation was begun in the child-bearing of the Blessed Virgin, so from this solemn festival of her Nativity may we obtain an increase of peace. Through Our Lord Jesus Christ. Amen.
Day Eight: September 7
V. O God, come to my assistance
R. O Lord, make haste to help me
Glory be to the Father....
Brilliant Aurora of Heaven, lovable Mary, your birth brought great consolation to the souls of the saints detained in purgatory, for it announced the approach of the Sun of Justice, Jesus Christ, Who would enlighten their darkness and then conduct them to paradise. May your birth give joy to my soul also, and obtain for me from God, patience in all adversities, a perfect and constant conformity to His most holy will.
Hail Mary...
Antiphon: Your Nativity, O Virgin Mother of God, was the herald of joy to the whole world; since from you arose the Sun of Justice, Christ our God, Who, destroying the curse, bestowed the blessing, and confounding death, rewarded us with life everlasting.
V. Let us celebrate with joy the birth of the Blessed Virgin Mary.
R. That she may intercede for us with Our Lord Jesus Christ.
Let us pray
Grant to us your servants, we beseech You, O Lord, the gift of Your heavenly grace, that as our salvation was begun in the child-bearing of the Blessed Virgin, so from this solemn festival of her Nativity may we obtain an increase of peace. Through Our Lord Jesus Christ. Amen.
Day Nine: September 8
V. O God, come to my assistance
R. O Lord, make haste to help me
Glory be to the Father....
Mediatrix between God and mankind, admirable Mary, by your birth you perfected the joy of all the children of Adam, who, through you, have received the Author of Grace, for He has made you the treasurer of all the graces which are imparted to us. May your birth be a special cause of joy to my soul by obtaining for me from God, eternal salvation and all the graces necessary to obtain it.
Hail Mary...
Antiphon: Your Nativity, O Virgin Mother of God, was the herald of joy to the whole world; since from you arose the Sun of Justice, Christ our God, Who, destroying the curse, bestowed the blessing, and confounding death, rewarded us with life everlasting.
V. Let us celebrate with joy the birth of the Blessed Virgin Mary.
R. That she may intercede for us with Our Lord Jesus Christ.
Let us pray
Grant to us your servants, we beseech You, O Lord, the gift of Your heavenly grace, that as our salvation was begun in the child-bearing of the Blessed Virgin, so from this solemn festival of her Nativity may we obtain an increase of peace. Through Our Lord Jesus Christ. Amen.
John the Baptist said: "He (Jesus) must increase and I must decrease." Commenting on this, Pope Benedict XVI said: "We will know God to the extent that we are set free from ourselves." In prison, John had to abandon everything for the sake of the truth he had proclaimed. In that darkness, he had only one thing to cling to, his awareness of God's love for him. Hasn't this been true down the ages? Saint after saint has traveled this road of dying to self so that Jesus may be known in and through that person. Dying to self is never easy, but only possible with the grace of God. We then come to the point we can say with Paul: "I live now, not I, but Christ in me." When our focus is Christ, we can allow him to strip us of everything that is not of him, in order to have what really matters. Death to self is the final victory of Jesus in us.
"If the Lord has permitted you to have some trial, bear it willingly and with gratitude, considering that it has happened for your good and that perhaps you well deserved it. If the Lord bestows upon you any kind of prosperity, thank him humbly and see that you become no worse for it, either through vain pride or anything else, because you ought not to oppose God or offend him in the matter of his gifts." (St. Louis, King of France) Practical advice! We complain many times of the trials of our life, but we fail to see the many sins of our past life, which are more destructive in the long run. The trials may be gifts from God, not to make up for our sins, as to be purified from the effects of our sins. On the other hand, the blessings that we receive from God are given to us in spite of the fact we do not deserve them. Our response should be gratitude and service. A grateful heart goes a long way whether in difficulties or in blessings. Hard to do? Yes. But the alternative is worse.
Are you seeking holiness? Part One
It is the will of God that we become holy. "God chose us in Christ Jesus, before the foundation of the world, to be holy and without blemish before him. In love he destined us for adoption to himself through Jesus Christ, in accord with the favor of his will, for the praise of the glory of his grace that he granted us in the beloved." (Ephesians 1:4-6)
This call was personalized and made possible at the time we were baptized. We became sons of God and Temples of the Holy Spirit, sharing in God’s life, which is holy. To further emphasize this call, we read in 1 Peter: "Be holy as I, the Lord your God, am holy."
Holiness is not an option for a few, but the expectation of God for everyone of us.
As a man, as a father, as a husband, are you truly committed to be a holy man? Or are you like St. Augustine, who for years told God, "I want to be holy, but not yet."
Before you can fulfill your responsibilities to your wife or your children, you must first fulfill your responsibility to God, seeking to grow in union with him. It begins with a "conversion": turning away from sin and it’s control in your life and turning to God as the center of your life. As we address the sins that separate us from God, we will be better able to deal with sins that cool our relationship with him. Like anything else, it is a process that requires commitment, discipline, and perseverance.
This commitment flows from the conviction that I do not want to be a slave of sin any longer. This conviction is based on the faith/fact that Jesus through his death and resurrection has set me free from the bondage of sin. But I must live in this freedom and not allow the enticement and control of sin to dampen my resolve.
Many years ago, a friend of mine had a dream. In it, she saw a large bird cage in which there was a bird flying in it or at times perch on a swing in it. Then she saw a hand rip open the door of the cage, leaving a large opening. Now the bird was free to escape from its prison. Instead, the bird kept flying around in the cage and sitting on its perch.
That is a reflection of our lives sometimes. Though we have the Sacrament of Reconciliation which sets us free, we choose not to go through that door, but remain in our self-imposed prison of sin. Or, if we do confess, we very shortly return to our state of slavery to sin.
What is needed is a determined commitment. But that commitment needs to be follow up with a daily discipline, which would undergird your resolve. This discipline includes daily prayer time with the Lord ; choosing to be conscious of what leads one to sin and making the firm resolve to avoid it; a daily examination of conscious to see how you are doing; having someone to hold you accountable as you seek to grow in the life of holiness.
The final step is to persevere and not become discouraged because you experience failures. Start again and again, no matter how many times it takes. It took Thomas Edison over 200 experiments before he found the right element for the light bulb. Have the same spirit of perseverance in your fight against sin. You will never be fully free of sin, but hopefully the sin that separates you from God will no longer be present, as you seek to deal with the sins that dampen your relationship.
"Often we are preoccupied with the question "How can we be witnesses in the Name of Jesus? What are we supposed to say or do to make people accept the love that God offers them?" These questions are expressions more of our fear than of our love. Jesus shows us the way of being witnesses. He was so full of God's love, so connected with God's will, so burning with zeal for God's Kingdom, that he couldn't do other than witness. Wherever he went and whomever he met, a power went out from him that healed everyone who touched him. (See Luke 6:19.) If we want to be witnesses like Jesus, our only concern should be to be as alive with the love of God as Jesus was." (Henri Nowen) What is the witness of people like Mother Teresa of Calcutta, St. John Paul II, Pope Francis? Their genuine love for people as they go out of themselves for the other. Love is the greatest and most effective way to witness the person and message of Jesus. This was confirmed by Jesus when he said: "They will know that you are my disciples by the love you show to others." We have been loved beyond measure by God. Now, we are called to respond by showing similar love to others. This was the love that converted the pagan Roman world. This is the love that can have the same effect today, if we but so witness. By grace, this can be done.
On a sabbath Jesus went to dine at the home of one of the leading Pharisees, and the people there were observing him carefully. He told a parable to those who had been invited, noticing how they were choosing the places of honor at the table. "When you are invited by someone to a wedding banquet, do not recline at table in the place of honor. A more distinguished guest than you may have been invited by him, and the host who invited both of you may approach you and say, ‘Give your place to this man,’ and then you would proceed with embarrassment to take the lowest place. Rather, when you are invited, go and take the lowest place so that when the host comes to you he may say, ‘My friend, move up to a higher position.’ Then you will enjoy the esteem of your companions at the table. For every one who exalts himself will be humbled, but the one who humbles himself will be exalted."
What is our attitude at functions and events to which we are invited?
What is humility? Here are some thoughts:
"Humility isn't thinking little of self; it isn't thinking of self at all."
"That the virtue of humility consists in the knowledge of certain truths, I had already recognized. These truths are: that I am nothing, that I can do nothing but sin, that I depend on God for everything--for existence, conservation, movement, and grace. What is more, I am most happy in my dependence on God, and I prefer to depend entirely on God rather than on myself." (St. Anthony Mary Claret)
"It is proof of deep humility if one realizes that he is condemned without guilt and yet suffers in silence. This is an excellent imitation of Christ, who innocently suffered for our guilt." (St. Theresa) "One day I was wondering why God so loves the humble when it suddenly and
unexpectedly struck me that this must be because he is the supreme Truth and humility is
truth." (St. Theresa of Avila, (Interiof Castle, VI,10)
"If we were humble, nothing would change us--neither praise nor discouragement. If someone were to criticize us, we would not feel discouraged. If someone were to praise us, we also would not feel proud." (Mother Teresa)
Then he said to the host who invited him, "When you hold a lunch or a dinner, do not invite your friends or your brothers or your relatives or your wealthy neighbors, in case they may invite you back and you have repayment. Rather, when you hold a banquet, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, the blind; blessed indeed will you be because of their inability to repay you. For you will be repaid at the resurrection of the righteous."
How do we apply this saying to ourselves?
Is humility an attitude of the heart and mind, seeing ourselves through the eyes of
God? As Francis of Assisi says: "I am who am as God sees me and nothing more." Being
whom God sees me to be and being that person is true humility.
“Apart from the cross, there is no other ladder by which we may get to heaven.” (St. Rose of Lima) By embracing the cross in his humanity, Jesus experienced the resurrection in his humanity. Our daily crosses can either be embraced or rejected. By embracing them, they enable us to prepare for life after death. By rejecting them, we are making our journey difficult. I know this doesn't make sense. But it is the paradox that Jesus speaks of in the Gospels. If we do not take up our cross and follow him, we can not be his disciples. If we are not his disciples, how can we be with him in eternity? To die to self (our cross) is to rise in him (our victory). Jesus didn't like the cross, but he endured it for our sake. We don't have to like our cross, but embracing it brings a deeper sharing in his divine life. The cross in time or glory and joy in eternity: which do we want?
"In looking at the analogy between Christ's Ascension and Mary's Assumption, we can conclude that Mary, in dependence on Christ, is the Queen who possesses and exercises over the universe a sovereignty granted to her by her Son. The title of Queen does not of course replace that of Mother: her queenship remains a corollary of her particular maternal mission and simply expresses the power conferred on her to carry out that mission." (St. John Paul II) The gift from God of Mary's Queenship is the culmination of all the graces she received beginning with her immaculate conception. But, as the Holy Father said, all the graces were focused on the most unique gift, being the Mother of our Lord, Jesus Christ. We honor Mary because God honors her. We honor her as the Mother of Jesus, and by his design, our Mother. And as Mother and Queen, she intercedes for us before the throne of God. Her greatest desire for us is that we will be with God forever in glory.
“Our wish, our
object, our chief preoccupation must be to form Jesus in ourselves, to make his
spirit, his devotion, his affections, his desires and his disposition live and
reign there. All our religious exercises should be directed to this end. It is
the work which God has given us to do unceasingly” (St. John Eudes
) How often do we reflect on the truth of these words? Is our preoccupation deepening our relationship with Jesus Christ, knowing that from this everything else will follow? Is our preoccupation more material, secular and keeping up with the world? It goes back to Jesus' reflection on the narrow road and the wide road. One leads to God; the other away from God. This idea is truly counter-cultural to the values of today's world. But in the end what will matter is our relationship with Jesus, not just a surface one, but a real, intimate one. That is if heaven is your goal in life.
As the man and father of the family, are you the spiritual leader in your home?
Jerry Drace says that 90 to 95 percent of the men who are in church on Sunday are not men who are spiritual leaders in their home," Drace says. "By that I mean they are not reading their Bible. They’re not praying consistently with their children." Dr. Gregory Popcak states, "Catholic homes are spiritually bankrupt, characterized by low Mass attendance, poor participation in religious education, and an inactive personal and family prayer life."
It is said that the man is the head of the family and the woman is the heart of the family. Each needs the other to survive and fulfill each’s individual role in a family.
What does it take for a man/father to exercise and fulfill his role as the spiritual leader? Here are some thoughts to reflect on:
1. The Lordship of Jesus Christ
Everyone who exercises leadership and authority needs to be under leadership and authority of someone else. If the woman is to submit to her husband as the head as if to the Lord, as St. Paul states, then the husband needs to submit totally to the Lord, as his head. To the extent a man does this, then his wife and children would be more likely to submit to his leadership. Jesus shows us the way in his own life. Though equal in his divinity, in his humanity, Jesus submitted to the Father. Is Jesus the Lord of your life in fact and by choice?
a) Jesus was a man of prayer: personal prayer and communal prayer. The father as the spiritual leader of his family is be a man of prayer both personal and family. "If a man is not praying, he is not a spiritual leader. Prayerless men have abdicated their place of spiritual authority and left their families open to attack. " If a man is too busy to cultivate a prayer life that places God first, he is definitely too busy about many things except the most important one.
"The depth of your relationship with God is in direct proportion to the depth of your commitment to Him; great commitment, great relationship; poor commitment, poor relationship. Prayer matters: it equips, anoints, and empowers. God-given authority and prayer go hand-in-hand. You can’t have one without the other."
b) To live out this dependency on the Father, before undertaking actions, Jesus would bring everything to the Father for his guidance and wisdom. How often do fathers act first and pray later, when they need help?
c) Jesus was sinless, we are not. We need to humble ourselves before the Lord, acknowledging our sinfulness and imperfections and our need for his grace to make right decisions.
d) Once Jesus prayed, he acted on what he felt the Father wanted him to do.
2. Have a servant’s heart.
Though Jesus was Lord and Teacher, he exhibited a servant’s heart both in his teachings and in his actions. He said: The Son of man came not to be serve but to serve and to give his life for the ransom of many. At the Last Supper, he demonstrated his servant’s heart by washing the feet of his disciples. "As I have done, so you must do." As a spiritual leader your best example is to be at the service of your family out of love. What would happen if you literally washed the feet of your spouse and children as a sign of your love?
a) Jesus showed the ultimate act of service on the cross.
He gave his life so that we may have life. St. Paul applies this lesson to husbands and fathers.
"Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ loved the church and handed himself over for her
." As spiritual leader, the husband/father seeks what is best for his family before his own desires and needs. He surrenders his interests to better provide for the needs of his family.
3. A spiritual leader is one who asks forgiveness and forgives. You are not perfect. You will make many mistakes. When you do, ask forgiveness. Your family is not perfect and needs to experience your mercy and forgiveness as well.
4. Whatever you do, do in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ out of love. Never stop saying "I love you." Never stop showing authentic love to each.
5. Begin to read, reflect and act on the Word of God. It is there you will find the directions to be the spiritual leader you have been chosen to be by God.
6. Take time to listen with your heart as well as your head, when you talk to each other. In their eyes, your time is very precious to them. Is it so in yours? Try to get behind the words to the reality behind them. Your family is your greatest treasure, after your shared life with God.
7. As a spiritual leader of your family, your first priority is to get to heaven. Your second priority is lead and intercede for your family that they will be in heaven with you. You will be remembered by God not by the material inheritance you left your family but by the spiritual inheritance you help them embrace. I tell couples before marriage that God will ask many questions, when we come before him. But the tree most important ones will be:
a) Who am to you? Was I the Lord and Savior of your life? Was relationship with me that important to you?
b) Where is your spouse in relationship to me because of you? You had these many years together. Is she closer to me because of you or further from me because of you?
c) Where are your children in relationship to me because of you? Are they closer to me or further away from me because of you?
Your feedback would be appreciated.
"Human relationships easily become possessive. Our hearts so much desire to be loved that we are inclined to cling to the person who offers us love, affection, friendship, care, or support. Once we have seen or felt a hint of love, we want more of it. That explains why lovers so often bicker with each other. Lovers' quarrels are quarrels between people who want more of each other than they are able or willing to give. It is very hard for love not to become possessive because our hearts look for perfect love and no human being is capable of that. Only God can offer perfect love. Therefore, the art of loving includes the art of giving one another space. When we invade one another's space and do not allow the other to be his or her own free person, we cause great suffering in our relationships. But when we give another space to move and share our gifts, true intimacy becomes possible." (Henri Nouwen) True love is always other-focused. Possessive love is self-focused. True love is expressed with arms outstretched to the other in a giving gesture. Possessive love is expressed with arms outstretched to the other to pull the other to self. The former frees the other to respond; the latter forces the other to resist. When a butterfly lands in our hand, we can either free it to stay or we can quickly close our hand to keep the butterfly for self. In the latter response, we will either crushed the butterfly or scare it away.
"And yet you hear people complaining about this present day and age because things were so much better in former times. I wonder what would happen if they could be taken back to the days of their ancestors--would we not still hear them complaining? You may think past ages were good, but it is only because you are not living in them." (St. Augustine) It is the same as the adage: the grass looks greener on the other side of the fence. Lot's wife looked back to Sodom with longing and so was frozen in that past. During the Exodus journey, the Israelites longed for the flesh pots of Egypt and they died in the desert without seeing the Promised Land. We are given the present moment to make the best of. The past is gone. The future is not, nor is it guaranteed. The past was no more perfect than the present. The grace of God for me is in the present moment. How I respond to that grace will impact the future. I can learn from the past but can't go back. God is the God of the present. So live and make the best of the now!
Jesus passed through towns and villages, teaching as he went and making his way to Jerusalem. Someone asked him, "Lord, will only a few people be saved?"
Jesus focuses the question not on how may are to be saved, but on the individual who should be concerned whether he/she will be saved.
What are you doing consciously to respond to the grace of salvation offered you by Jesus through his death and resurrection? Is salvation a focus of your life?
He answered them, "Strive to enter through the narrow gate, for many, I tell you, will attempt to enter but will not be strong enough.
"Salvation depends first on God’s grace, then on our cooperation and obedience. Jesus here stresses the difficulties of the spiritual life, where few will enter God’s glory while the door remains open."
After the master of the house has arisen and locked the door, then will you stand outside knocking and saying, ‘Lord, open the door for us.’ He will say to you in reply, ‘I do not know where you are from. And you will say, ‘We ate and drank in your company and you taught in our streets.’ Then he will say to you, ‘I do not know where you are from. Depart from me, all you evildoers!’
How do you apply this to your life right now? Is knowing Jesus or being his disciples enough?
What more is Jesus asking of us?
Is there an urgency in Jesus’ message? Since we do not know when the door will be shut, how should we respond?
The four words we don’t want God to say to us are: "I don’t know you!"
In another Gospel Jesus says, "It is not those who say, Lord, Lord, who will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only those who do the will of my Father."
What is the narrow gate Jesus is talking about? Is it the same as the narrow road that few travel?
The impetenitent will be sht out from God’s blessings..
And there will be wailing and grinding of teeth when you see Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob and all the prophets in the kingdom of God and you yourselves cast out. And people will come from the east and the west and from the north and the south and will recline at table in the kingdom of God. For behold, some are last who will be first, and some are first who will be last."
Jesus is speaking to his own people, the Jews. He is indicating that others—the non-Jews—will respond to his message and experience the life God. Some of the Jews became complacent about their relationship with God. Have we become complacent? How do we apply this to ourselves and others?
To be holy as you, Lord, are holy is my real vocation in life. All other callings and desires are secondary. To grow in holiness is to grow in love. To grow in love is to do everything out of love for you. To love this way is to surrender my life to you as Lord. The more you are the Lord of my life, the holier I will be. To choose to do your will in all things is, not only to call you Lord, but to embrace you as Lord. At that point you will be the All in All of my life. With St. Paul I can proclaim: "I live now not I but Christ Jesus in me." In all this, it is to your grace that I am responding in every step of the journey to holiness. Lord, help me to be holy both in the today and in the future.
"But God was pleased that Mary should in all things resemble Jesus; and as the Son died, it was becoming that the Mother should also die; because, moreover, He wished to give the just an example of the precious death prepared for them, He willed that even the most Blessed Virgin should die, but by a sweet and happy death. " (St. Alphonsus Liguori) Free from sin from conception by God's grace, she is free from the effects of sin, which is corruption, by God's grace. The grace of the Assumption is the continuation of God's blessings to Mary. United to her Son in life before death, she is united to him after death. He rose from the dead, she was assumed into heaven. Because we have sinned and been redeemed by God, we will die, our bodies will corrupt, but by God's grace wee will be raised from the tomb on the last day. Her assumption prefigured our resurrection. She is with God in eternal glory in a glorified body. We will be with God, hopefully, after death in glory, as we await the resurrection and glorification of our bodies.
"There is no danger if our prayer is without words or reflection because the good success of prayer depends neither on words nor on study. It depends upon the simple raising of our minds to God, and the more simple and stripped of feeling it is, the surer it is....In prayer one must hold fast and never let go, because the one who gives up loses all. If it seems that no one is listening to you, then cry out even louder. If you are driven out of one door, go back in by the other." (St. Jane Frances de Chantal) Many of us struggle with prayer. Is it because we want to be in control of the conversation and relationship? Is it because we try to impress the Lord and earn his attention? What if we look at prayer as being for the Lord and not the other way around? What if we just "waste" time with the Lord by being in his presence and being for him? The model for this form of prayer is Mary, the sister of Martha and Lazarus. She sat at Jesus' feet, gazing and listening to him. Can we just sit with the Lord, gazing on him without him having to speak to us? The Psalmist says: "Be still and know that I am the Lord."
"We become what we love and who we love shapes what we become. If we love things, we become a thing. If we love nothing, we become nothing. Imitation is not a literal mimicking of Christ, rather it means becoming the image of the beloved, an image disclosed through transformation. This means we are to become vessels of God's compassionate love for others." (St. Clare of Assisi) How true are her reflections! Think about it. "We become what we love and who we love shapes what we become." What do you love? Who do you love? Ultimately, it comes down to: Do we truly love Christ? Are we in love with Christ? If so, our love of Christ will then dictate our love for others. If not, we will find that no other love will ever fully satisfy the deeper longings within us.
I am beginning, today, a blog just for Men of God, who desire to be the man God wants you to be. Hope you will enjoy the reflections. At times, I will be incorporating the thoughts of others.
In every age, but more especially today, children need fathers and grandfathers who model and formed their children into the men and women of God they are created to be. There is a diabolic attack on today’s men. "The forces of feminism, homosexuality and secularism attack patriarchy, but truth will always triumph."
What is the truth? As a man, you are created in the image and likeness of God. Through baptism, you share in his own divine life. You are a man of God by design and grace. To embrace your true masculinity, your relationship with Christ is essential. "Your masculinity needs to be fully Christ-like. It needs to be strong, but not be ashamed to have a tender heart. If men can get themselves sorted out, then they will in turn help their sons and daughters to be strong, pure and noble children of God."
"A father is to be a strong, loving, mature man who is clothed in the grace of Christ. He considers his responsibilities and authority as from God, and is therefore humbled and bears the authority with great awe -- never lording it over others, but treating each one of his charges with tenderness and total attention. The Christian home is "ruled" by the father, but in a spirit of total self-giving and loving attention for the needs of all. This is a very high ideal, but it is a beautiful one, and one that we should not apologize for simply because some fathers have abused it. The father should call constantly on God for help and realize that he relies on grace to sustain him at all times.
"Furthermore, when we fail to reach the ideal we need to be humble enough to ask forgiveness both from God and from our wives and children. This is very important because children need to know that their fathers are not only fallible, but able to recognize their own frailty and ask forgiveness for their failings. If children see their father ask forgiveness they will not mind when they are asked to exercise the same humility."
Throughout my journey, Lord, I experience the mysterious paradox of death and life. To live, I must die. It begins at natural birth and ends in eternal birth. To live outside the womb, I had to die to that intimate connection with my mother for a different life and intimate relationship. To grow into the fullness of my humanity my cells go through a continual life-death-life process, imperceptible to me. To embrace my true self, I must die to selfishness and become other-focused. I must die to what leads me into sin, so that my life of holiness and oneness with God can deepen. Only when I physically die and hopefully enter into eternal life with you, will I no longer die. I will be fully and perpetually alive in and with you. That is when the words of St. Paul will be realized in me: "Death, where is your sting?" O Glorious Day!
Jesus said to his disciples: "I have come to set the earth on fire, and how I wish it were already blazing!
What is this "fire" Jesus is referring to? It is a zeal for the Gospel message and life.
Do you have this "fire" at the core of your being?
What do you need to reignite this fire in you? There is a baptism with which I must be baptized, and how great is my anguish until it is accomplished!
What is this "baptism" Jesus is referring to? It is his imminent suffering and death on the cross.
This is the baptism Jesus was speaking of when John and James asked to sit at his right and left. Cf Mk 10:38.
Can you embrace the mystery of the cross in your life? With the same surrender as Jesus? What prevents you?
Do you think that I have come to establish peace on the earth? No, I tell you, but rather division. From now on a household of five will be divided, three against two and two against three; a father will be divided against his son and a son against his father, a mother against her daughter and a daughter against her mother, a mother-in-law against her daughter-in-law and a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law."
This is a strange statement for Jesus, the Prince of Peace, to make. What does he mean?
Part of the life of the disciple is to choose to follow Jesus as Lord and Master even if it means to become at odds with family members.
Have you ever experienced this division in your family because of your commitment to follow Jesus?
Have you ever had to compromise to please others while knowing that this is not what Jesus wanted you to do?
What application do we make in our lives from this passage?
The "fire" will keep Jesus at the center of our lives, during any struggles we have with others because of our relationship with Jesus
“The nation... doesn’t simply need what we have. It needs what we are.” (St. Teresa Benedicta of the Cross) How true this is today more so than previous times! We are to be the salt of the earth and the light of the world. We are called to be the presence of true love in a world which is broken and feel adrift in the light of darkness. We are called to be the holiness of God in a world adrift in a sea of sin and evil. We are called to be the disciples of Jesus Christ in the world arena of hate, anger and self-destruction. We are called to be bearers of the Truth, the Way and the Life, which is Jesus Christ, whether the world around us wants Him or not. The first century Christians found themselves in a similar position as we are in today. Who they were led people to what they had. They were in love with God more than they were with life itself. That love was obvious and overpowering in time.
“I am not capable of doing big things, but I want to do everything, even the smallest things, for the greater glory of God.”(St. Dominic) Many of the saints have come to this same conclusion. It is so simple and profound, yet so difficult for us to embrace on a daily basis. But what if we did, would our life be more saintly than otherwise? Where do we start? In this present moment and from this present moment, we can be conscious of this saying and implement it as best we can today. It is a choice to do the smallest thing out of love and for the glory of God. Nothing is too small or insignificant. It will help us to keep our focus on God throughout our day.
Novena to the Assumption of the Virgin Mary (Aug 6-14)
Majestic Queen of Heaven and Mistress of the Angels, you received from God the power and command to crush the head of Satan. Therefore, we humbly beg of you, send forth the legions of Heaven, that under your command they may seek out all evil spirits, engage them everywhere in battle, curb their pride, and hurl them back into the pit of hell. “Who is like unto God?”
With firm confidence we present ourselves before you, our most loving Mother, afflicted and troubled as we are, and we beg you to let us understand the love you have for us by granting this petition, if it is according to the Will of God and profitable for our salvation:
(mention your request).
Good and tender Mother, you shall ever be our hope and the object of our love. Mother of God, send forth the Holy Angels to defend us and drive far from us the cruel foe.
Holy Angels and Archangels, defend and keep us.
