"Be kind to one another, compassionate, forgiving one another as God has forgiven you in Christ. Be imitators of God, as beloved children, and live in love, as Christ loved us and handed himself over for us as a sacrificial offering to God for a fragrant aroma." (Eph 4:32-5:2) The key words in this passage to guide our actions are: "Be imitators of God...live in love, as Christ loved us." The bar is deliberately set high. As God, in Christ, has shown his love to us, so must we do to others. No option. We can't be faithful children of the Father, if we don't do what he shows us  in Christ.. Authentic love is always sacrificial, demanding death of the self in some way. That is the way of Christ, the way of the cross. It can only be done by the grace of God, which is freely given, but not always embraced. Our focus cannot be self but other, that other being God.